Includes plot summary, trailer, image gallery, cast and crew. Mystery Thriller Movies Pez ' title='Mystery Thriller Movies Pez ' />Every Stephen King Film Ranked. If youre reading this, its too late for me. Pez-Dispenser-e1438633454465.jpg' alt='Mystery Thriller Movies Pez ' title='Mystery Thriller Movies Pez ' />Offers 50 GB of free storage space. Uploaded files are encrypted and only the user holds the decryption keys. If youre reading this, its too late for me. Ive been chained up on a soiled bed in a crawl space beneath the room where they film Alpha Book Club segments. Where is Pez Little Mix star Perrie Edwards worries followers by temporarily deactivating her Instagram account. Giallo Italian pronunciation, plural gialli is a 20thcentury Italian thriller or horror genre of literature and film. Especially outside of Italy, giallo refers. Ive been chained up on a soiled bed in a crawl space beneath the room where they film Alpha Book Club segments and demanded I rank every Stephen King movie. Was it last week A month ago Time moves differently here. A cat watches me at all hours, and theres a red balloon tied to my big toe. So here I am, ranking all the authors adaptations. No miniseries. No made for TV stuffstill a task only someone insane would undertake. Why is it so difficult The process of judging King against King from a quality standpoint isnt just a challenge for the obvious reasons. The bloated body of work. The rabid fandom understandably willing to fight for faves. Do you judge the movie for its intrinsic value, or how well it captured Kings original tale Theres also the breadth of the stories. They tend to fall in infinite, diametrically opposed subgroups The b horror schlock, the earnestly affecting dramas, the money lined modern terrors, the art house Americana. They make for a dysfunctional family, all lumped together like this. But thats where I come in. If something was meant to be scary, I judged on how scary it was. Touching and humane Campy and fun Same thing. In other words, I ranked these films based on the criteria they set out for themselves. Once youre done reading, please send help. Riding the Bullet 2. An eye roll in movie form, the Mick Garris directed adaptation of Riding The Bullet stretched Kings 2. Its biggest sin is self seriousness, and the scares are like a cheap haunted house where masked weirdos half heartedly say Boo, as you round the corner. Maniacal, beheaded David Arquette is a bright spot trying to shine through the black hole of this thing. The Mangler 1. 99. Based on a King short, directed by Tobe Hooper, starring Robert Englund without the striped sweater, The Mangler was billed as a collaboration between three modern masters of horror. Its more on par with Death Bed The Bed That Eats. This is one of the many cases where a filmmaker took a flimsy King premise and treated it with dead seriousness. An industrial laundry press gets possessed by a demon and starts killing Put up a sign not to walk near it or something. There are a few fun bits of gore, and Ted Levine somehow not a master of horror after Silence of the Lambs more than earns his paycheck when his coat gets caught in the evil machine, but this is plot free horror you can tear up your claim ticket for. Cell 2. 01. 6The worlds cell phones transform their addicted users into zombie like murderers, making it the get off my lawniest of Kings concepts. Samuel L. Jackson and John Cusack look like they called their banks after every take to see if the check cleared, and the plot is a yawning stroll through the library of zombie cliches. This came out last year, which is insane, especially considering how much it feels like a quickie rip off of The Crazies. Appropriately enough, its a movie that refused to stay dead long after it should have been abandoned. Graveyard Shift 1. With the claustrophobia of its basement tunnel setting and the horrid death bat digesting people left and right, this barrel bottom creature feature feels like an earth set Alien that is very, very bad. Instead of watching it, seek out a supercut of Brad Dourifs best moments, which should include a bevy of scenes where his Vietnam veteran turned exterminator cackles with crazed glee after yelling at rats. Find a job you love, people. A Return to Salems Lot 1. Consider the next few items the gauntlet of bad sequels. Almost all are tangential to King originals, but they still adapt his characters. Well get through it together. Oddly enough, you wont see Salems Lot on this list because it was a miniseries. Its follow up was also barely in theaters, and its easy to see why. B movie legend Larry Cohens cheap signature is all over it, but it manages an interesting concept about cultural relativism at its core. What happens when you respect other cultures implicitly, but one of those cultures uses human blood for fuel Michael Moriarty plays an anthropologist who opens the movie by filming a human sacrifice hes totally cool with. When he gets to Jerusalems Lot, the vampires employ him to tell their story. Toss in a Nazi hunter and an elder vamp getting stabbed with the American flag, and you getsomething. Sure. Its something. The Rage Carrie 2 1. Even without the looming shadow of the original hanging over it, the story of Carrie Whites half sister fine, whatever is forgettable in the extreme. It follows the same basic plot, and it features a surprising number of maritime implements as murder weapons. Its a made for TV level film, plagued with production problems out of the gate, that still somehow hobbled into theaters covered in blood. Children of the Corn II The Final Sacrifice 1. A textbook definition of an unnecessary sequel, this return to Nebraska also opened the door for a franchise, demon like, to haunt the original on home video. After the devastation in Gatlin, the nearby town of Hemingford shout out to The Stand takes in the poor, sadistic children who go right back to their cult worship of their shucking god and right back to killing adults. The story is as flat as the Midwests elevation, but you do get to see a Mac truck bounce an old lady in an electric wheelchair like a pinball into a Bingo parlor. Still, a scene where adults get together for a town meeting how adult of them only to be locked inside a building that the kids light on fire is a clever, no frills indictment of impotent authority figures, so its not a total wash. Watch Emilie Jolie Movie Stream. Secret Window 2. It looks slick because of its budget and movie star cast, but this tale of a revenge crazed writer John Turturro going after another writer Johnny Depp for plagiarism is a Depp indulging trek with a telegraphed twist. For some reason, Turturro is an AmishHick hybrid who does his best with the dialogue even though writerdirector David Koepp gives him some real mouthfuls to spit out. Its the least eccentric of Depps modern performances, but that isnt a high bar, and he really slings it wide by the time the action heats up. Proof that, when you paper over a b movie with a bunch of money and familiar faces, you can still see the schlock beneath. Tales From the Darkside The Movie 1. Quibble with its connection to King if you want, this decent anthology features an Arthur Conan Doyle story, a bit of Japanese mythology from the screenwriter behind Beetlejuice, and George Romero adapting a King story about a sly cat executing karmic revenge on the owner of a pharmaceutical company. Its upfront about its cheese, but the Cat From Hell segment also plays out with the gripping paranoia that many tell tale heart stories posses. Its a descent into madness with the added bonus of a cat killing a dude by crawling down his throat. Pet Sematary II 1. Speaking of faithful pets, Mary Lamberts second outing with the undead franchise was more a remake than a sequel, except there is a dog instead of a cat this time, and its a commentary on the frustrating teenage cusp of adulthood instead of a warning not to live near a highway where pets and people get run over all the time. With a protective, zombie attack dog, its like a blend of Pet Sematary and Cujo, and young Edward Furlong brings his angsty brooding John Connor into a horror flick. Plus, Clancy Brown is the villain Its stale overall and not at all scary, and there are a lot of great ideas suffocating under the surface trying to escape. A Good Marriage 2. The only reason this isnt lower on the list is Joan Allens performance as a loving wife who discovers that her husband Anthony La. Paglia is a serial killer. The story is too straightforward to be all that interesting.